Where does it end and more importantly, how does it end? I think of the hours I have spent staring at pictures of circa 1935 from Europe. Families on holiday, gatherings, class pictures, team pictures. I stare at the smiles, imagine the stories behind these pictures. I stare at the few family pictures left behind by my family there. I look and wonder. What would they have done if they had known? What could they have done? And what are we doing now? Are we caught in the same loop, knowing, but not, wondering to move or not, but where to go, what steps to take and how did this all happen?
How did the United States of America, a country which fought a war to keep it one Union, a country which stood for democracy, for the valuing of people for who they are, which fought against hatred and prejudice, bias, even as it persisted - how did we get here? Why am I seeing pictures of rowdy men waving huge Nazi flags, shouting about Jews, screaming of blood and soil? And this is the tip of the iceberg.
We have a government where people are resigning, explaining how wrongly off the path this administration has wandered. We are left with a government of know nothings set on their path of destruction as they cancel all safety regulations, as they rip apart the fabric of government for the people in their greed for profits, the almighty dollar to be racked up and boasted of in company meetings and forms. Those who resign are taking to leaving secret not so secret messages in their letters. RESIST. IMPEACH. There are signatures growing on a petition to form a congressional committee to examine the mental ability of presidents to remain in office. Even the infrastructure committee has resigned, the "big" promise of the Trump campaign. It too has gone the way of all things in this now rotten administration. With more rot growing.
Now we hear that a memo re transgender is coming and the plan? To separate all who cannot deploy, who would find it difficult. Deployability? What the hell is that? What? So the mothers who truly wish not to leave their children and the fathers who feel the same, the sons who wish not to stress their parents or leave aging ones behind for a stretch - shall we just disband the armed forces? Why single out transgender soldiers who have served loyally and well? Right! Prejudice again. And again and yet again.
We already have sold our country down the river what with the co-operation between the Trump campaign and Russia. Yet another email has surfaced with another top Trump campaign aide trying to set up the meeting of Trump people and Russia. The thought, the idea, of a traitor in office, of a Manchurian candidate in office, as our President or somewhere high up in that same administration is chilling to the bone, to the very marrow.
And now we hear that those American diplomats in Cuba have not only suffered hearing losses but have suffered brain damage and damage to their central nervous system. This is where our energy needs to be expended. Find the answer rather than run around trying to drum up rallies when one should be presidential and presiding!! We are under attack from within and without and we have an erratic unstable being in charge.
The country is riven, driven into tribes of shouting, jeering people, protesters and white supremacists. We have families who are split, driven apart, we have friends who must make a pact not to discuss politics and ruin friendships, but for how long. This is a temporary fix and at some point, sooner than later, one will have to choose, many will have to choose.
Does one support a bigot, a mentally unbalanced man who speaks crazily when off the teleprompter? Does one support a hater of all that is not him and family? Does one support industry again at the cost of humanity and suffering or do we find a compromise there as we had before? Do we institutionalize and legitimate racial, sexist, religious hatred and bias or do we fight it and how? Where does it end? This question is more important than any other for it answers all. It outranks all other questions and concern for frankly, bad roads, a poor decision on broadband, a cheating swap - what matters it all if the country tanks.
Perhaps I do know why I wake up shivering with chattering teeth. It is the horror of reality today in the country and the fear that there is no way out. When will it end and how?
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