FIFTY TWO

    52. Not such an amazing number. Attached to a bunch of zeros and a dollar sign might mean one won the lottery. 52 could also mean 52 minutes or seconds and that is not a long amount of time. But attach that 52 to the word years, and while though but a speck in the eyes of the life of our universe, when referring to human meaning, it means a lot.
     Today is our 52nd wedding anniversary. Comparing the pictures of now and then can almost make one believe that we are talking about two different couples!! And perhaps that assumption is correct.
     We were kids when we married. We had barely been out of state, let alone the country or anywhere in the world. Going to the City (Manhattan) was still a call to dressup and put on city manners. We did not have two pennies to rub together and still had to finsih college.
     So what did we have? Well, we thought we had the most important reason for marrying. We believed we loved each other and wished to build a life and family together. And so we did, but, when I look back, I wonder at the naivete of those two kids and what they took upon themselves.
     52 years later I look back and understand how love changes, deepens, becomes more intense and meaningful as the years go on. Working through good times and bad, solving problems, growing into job responsibilities, and managing family life is not so easy. It takes a great deal of hard work and learning over the years, to compromise and adjust. (Of course, most of the time I was right! LOL) 
     Two years ago we had a big blowout for the fiftieth, a party where we mixed so many different groups of friends and marveled at how much we had learned over the years, how we had learned to get along with others, to see the value in all, to accept differences, to admire differences and we hoped that others would accept us in our various facets and presentations.
     Most of all we hoped that we would still have years together, to watch our kids and grandkids grow into their own lives - and for great grandbabies (hint, hint). (And an LOL on that one too as marriage and family will come at the right moment) but I am waiting......
      And so we did. We grew into different people, different from those two kids, yet the same. We valued our life together, the family we had raised and their lives as adults, the children they were raising and the friends we found. We also found a deeper love and appreciation for each other and for what we had.
     Two years ago we received a diagnosis of PD for myself, a devastating piece of information. It took - and is still taking - adjustments and acceptance and determination to beat it back as best we can- and has brought us to a new high point in our lives. In addition to the new group of people we have met, great people, caring people, we have found strength in each other, understanding what this means for the rest of our lives, the changes that must be made, the expectations that must be tempered. But through it all, we remained strong, leaning on each other, and, as always, timing our meltdowns. When one is struggling, the other is strong and we change places as needed. 
      So, Gerry, after 52 years of marriage, five years before of meeting and getting to know you, through good times and hard times, through joys and sorrows, I loved you then as a kid of 19 and I love you now, a deeper and I believe, more meaningful love than before. And though you never proposed to me, I guess we are married and had better get used to that fact!!!
     Luv u, and Happy Anniversary!!!!
     May G-d bless us in the coming years as we meet the future and what it brings, together, as always.