There is a palpable sense, an odor, of evil these days. It suffuses the very air we breathe. It surrounds us, encloses us within a circle of fear, a cloud of despair and confusion. Wherefore, why, when have things changed so that I must now worry in existential terms. Why do I now have to remind my kids to be safe, to be alert, to pay attention, to keep it low key, to avoid confrontation. If trouble arises, do not play hero and get to a person or place of safety and security. To remember that things are replaceable, people not. Leave the luggage and take the hand of your loved one and get thee gone to a place of safety, or relatively so.
Then I pinch myself, check that I am awake, not caught up in the throes of one of those awful so real nightmares that even upon awakening, there is a definite moment of unsureness, as to where one is in actuality. Real? Dream? Life? Not? Was it a nightmare arising from reality, an awful reality, one we had so foolishly, wishfully, thought gone, dead, consigned to the backroom closet where the worst of mankind's errors were consigned, to rot forever, never to return.
Why then does the nightmare feel so achingly, bone rattling real? Because it is. Because it is. Taking on more substance by the second. No longer the stuff of nightmares but rather the stuff of horrific once unthinkable daymares, lived out, in, through. Again. Once again. Growing in intensity, propelled by great pulses of bloodlust, released ancient -not so ancient -tropes and memes of hate, palpable, reeking, and deadly. It is mob behavior of mammoth proportion, emanating from a world and its inhabitants we had thought certainly far more enlightened than they now reveal themselves to be. Foolish us. Dangerously foolish us.
Again, to again live in a world outlined by wishful thinking. That if we were to think hard enough, clap hands in a mighty display of belief in the ultimate goodness of humanity, in the forever power and presence of a Tinkerbel, and magical fairy dust that all would be okay. Finally, we were safe, home, accepted, even admired in some quarters. That we had reliable, true friends who shared our values and hopes. Who had our backs, protected our 'six'.
Now these selfsame 'friends' have uncloaked, revealed their inner ugliness. Intense. Frightening. Faces of those who now wallow in bloody thoughts, in dreams of violence and bloodshed, of chasing, capturing the enemy - me, my family, my friends - the 9 month old baby kidnapped, the 3-year-old twins, the elderly peace activist, the father defending his family, the teenager celebrating music and love. We, them, us, are the enemy? Those who wish to defend fellow Jews, to defend a homeland are killed for it, brutally, savagely. Bitter, deadly hate.
That hate, of the deadly pogroms, the rapes, the kidnapping, the slaughter, the butchery and viciousness has been reborn, repurposed and has spread its seeds of violence throughout a rather fertile world as well as in my land of birth, America, my homeland, or so I thought until I have been shown otherwise.
I have etched on my eyes scenes of Jewish college kids chased into the library at Cooper Uhion, calling out pleas to 'let us in", to barricade themselves in a room, their lives in actual danger. Reminiscent of older scenes of Jews hiding from perpetrators of hate and murder, be it in the Middle Ages, the Renaissance, France with Dreyfus, Hitlerian violence, and the silence of a world. Of rampages against Jews in the lands of Arabia. Ugly vignettes of history repeating themselves.
All driven, consumed by unleashed seemingly societal approved bloodlust, an explosion of hate, the values of the Purge movies of rage, translated into real life. Here? In America? In institutes of higher learning where once liberals fought the enemy of all -race hatred? Here, in America? Where Jews helped finance the American Revolution? Where fellow Jews fought for and died for the country. Where they had and still do, served in its governments, contributed to society - doctors, teachers, researchers? Here, in America? My America? The America I had once confidently thought to be a good place for the next generations? What is to say to a frightened daughter? Or to a grandchild not understanding why this is happening, why so much anger and hatred, bloodlust overwhelming. Why?
Sadly, I have no answers for it is illogical. It is a vicious growth industry useful for despots, but it will, does, always, consume the perpetrator as well as the target. It is self-defeating. Where are the leaders to fight this, to educate those in need of enlightenment?
Nowhere, these days, certainly not within the recent clown show in the House, which elected as a leader a man who wished to overthrow our government and is now two heartbeats away from the Oval Office. His policies are retrograde in the worst manner, his only redeeming factor his support of Israel. However, if he claims G-d spoke to him and told him to back off-answer, please. The direction of the tattered GOP is not encouraging at all. This nation faces a dire future unless something is done, quickly and wisely. Only if the nation holds together in the middle, and the flanks remain strong and steady. A dire outlook be one Jewish or not!
We need help. lt will come from those who retain sanity; we have faith that our non-Jewish friends will stand with us, by us and love us as we love them.
So we hope and we pray. And we depend on the gracious aid from Above, albeit it a tad late in coming. Perhaps we deserve that in this world of ours.
Hashem yishmor aleinue - G-d will watch over us, and once again the haters will be defeated.
But when, dear Lord, when?
Please, I beg of you, my friends, remain together in prayers for Yitzy. He is having a difficult week, some very strong chemo. My heart breaks for hm, and I so wish I could take on his pain, be it on me, rather than on an amazing13 year old who retains his wide grin and sunny outlook, and an optimistic viewpoint, a strong faith in G-d, and an amazing connection to the flora and fauna around. Including snakes. Yuck!
HEAL YITZY!
Yitzchak Elimelech ben Chana Sarah
May he be granted refuah shelaymah bimheyrah beyameinu.
AMEN. AMEN
AM YISROEL CHAI.
"May the Omnipresent One have mercy on our brothers the whole House of Israel who are in distress or captivity, whether on sea or land. May He lead them from distress to relief, from darkness to light, and from oppression to redemption, now, swiftly and soon - and let us say: AMEN.
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