As if. As if the tears I had shed yesterday were not enough. As if the tears of Jews around the world had not been enough. As if they had never been and will never be enough. For otherwise, why would they continue to be shed in overwhelming immeasurable copious quantities and so many times that count was lost long ago. There are no numbers able to accurately report the number of times the people of Israel mourned their dead, their slaughtered, their disappeared into smoke and ashes, or the ground heaved in violent response to the abominations concealed within.
How many more times can our souls, our eyes, our hearts, undergo the torment. To see mothers cradling their slaughtered child. How many times must we see parents die protecting their children. How many times must we watch Jewish communities burying their slaughtered, even to today and to the foreseeable future.
How many more times, Dear Lord, how many? Never ending lines of weeping mourning souls as if we had not suffered enough. Why? Why must it continue to this very day, to tomorrow, to next week, to the foreseeable future? Why? Dear Lord, Why? Are we not spoken of as the People of the Book, Your Book? The People of the Lord? Your Children? Your subjects? Have we not sung Your praises, written and vocalized the promises of protection from now and for all eternity? What more can be asked of us? How many more fast flowing rivers of blood must we generate till it is enough? In fact, G-d on High - when and if will it ever be enough!! When will those eternally bloodsucking swords be stilled, be turned into plowshares?
ENOUGH. But apparently not so. Never so.
Or is it that our faith, challenged, even weakened at times, can serve another purpose but at such a high cost! Is that purpose worthy of the steep price paid? Have we, Your People, not been sufficient in dedication and acknowledgement of our intent never to forsake Thee, never to ever end our prayers our psalms, our songs, our liturgy, all of it words of Your praise, of Your glory. Even as we await the seemingly inevitable, or combat the swords held at our necks. Our children and our homes, our synagogues, turned into ashes. Even as we rebuild, building synagogues in the midst of the death camps, even as we enter the chambers of death, even at the very moment of death as we choke on the dust of death, even then. Even then, throughout all the centuries, all the millennia of yesterday, today, and that which awaits us in the tomorrows, we sang and continued to sing of our faith. We shout out the words of Shema - Hear Oh Israel, The Lord our God, The Lord is One. Faith. I believe. We believe. So how much more, Dear Lord. How much more?
When??? Have we not shed enough tears? Have we not been filled with the overflowing grief of terror, of horror, of despair and always of a never dying faith?! WHEN!!! Our wait has been long enough.
I gather in Your eyes it has neither been long enough nor of sufficient cost. I, and many others, beg to differ. Even today, tomorrow, next week, we are subjected to threats, to abuse, to attacks, verbal, physical, emotional. We have as few as 24 or less living hostages subjected to the same conditions and tortures of the Holocaust. Why? Why?
I cannot fathom it. I simply cannot. Is it a block on my part and the part of others who question or is there some wounded piece of You that Your people have offended in lack of perfection? Have we not walked the straight line all the time? To a higher degree than you like, but still, we are Your people, trying to survive, do good for the world, and if we are not perfect, remember, Hashem, we were, are, created this way, by Your will and command, to seek perfection, recognize errors and atone for them. Allow us to do so without the inhumane suffering we are undergoing and have undergone for far too long.
We are good people and do not deserve what has been handed to us on a tarnished, beaten-up metal plate of shoddy material and construction. We are people not of cheap construction and stand firm in our faith, even if strayed at times, have always returned and never wandered too far to be unable to return home. We bring our brethren lost back to us. And we continue to sing of and for You.
Time to end this nonsense. Time to stop our tears. Why must we hear the beautiful music emanating from a 130-year-old violin, which survived Auschwitz, though its owner did not, played by Agam Berger, a former hostage of Hamas who persisted in her faith even as she called for help from the depths of Hell. Mi'maahmakim keraticha - from the literal depths I called, accompanied by a young man who lost his parents, no, he did not lose them. They were stolen from him on October 7. All this taking place alongside the very tracks which brought so many of Your people to their deaths.
Why must we continue to cry. Why must we have to break down at the site of survivors of October 7 alongside survivors of the Holocaust and family members of all, gathered together in a gas chamber at Auschwitz Birkenau to sing the Hatikva. Was it not enough to see Agam Berger playing by the train tracks? When is enough met?
Why must we have to persist in creating new organizations to fight antisemitism, to fight this rampant, toxic JewHatred that has grown ugly deep roots and toxic petals? Must this continue? Have we not cried enough? Have we not heard enough? Have we not prayed enough? Have we not lost enough?
Lord, tell us. Let us know, for if we do not know we cannot act upon that knowledge.
For all the torments and agonies of our yesterdays,
for the uncertainty of the todays,
and hopefully for the promises of tomorrow -
Be with us as you promised. Me'atah V'ad Olam. From now until forever, for all eternity.
Hashem, this is only the voice of one little insignificant person. My pleas may not be worthy of Your ears but certainly the amassed voices, ears, souls and hearts and tears of Your People should be enough to get Your attention. Hear them. See them Do something now. NOW!!!!
No. More. When.
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