MY SISTER

 

I have been sitting here. Staring at the screen. Wondering. How am I to say goodbye to my sister? My sister is always there. For 15 years we shared a room. Fo all my 77 years   I had a live in adviser. I could always trust you. We were – no, still are- sisters. Always. Your 4 ½ years you had on me allowed for your experiences to benefit me as well. Please note, Tzip, I said 4 ½, not 5, lest you reach down from the heavens and smack me, as you reminded me about that    I learned quickly.   Able to advise me. To allow me to watch and wonder. To admire. And hope to emulate one day. To have the ease she had with meeting new people, winning them over. A smile and a laugh which would make the biggest grump smile back.

When Tzipi moved to Israel a big hole opened in my life. Telephone calls, zooms and now  WhatsApp, which by the way, I can't stand. So much more complicated but for two weeks every year you would come visit and off we went - to concerts of oldies   any form of Mamma Mia. How Tzipi loved to dance and sing  with the music.

 So what is a sister? A sister is someone with whom you share private jokes which no one else gets. On a rainy, gloomy day, I could pick up the phone, call, and say without introduction - another   Dellwood morning. And she would understand, and we would laugh because along with that statement came shared memories and only the two of us remain to understand and share those memories, those jokes, the smiles and even the tears. Who do I tell our private jokes to now? With whom do I share the story of her one. day of misconduct. When she opened the valve on a radiator, those big clumsy things -In Mr. Hoffman's class. And my parents when called in to discuss this terrible, devilish act of their daughter, they could barely contain their laughter. That too became a joke. A joke in the family. And A private joke among sisters.

         A sister. A sister is special. No matter how many times you can argue, no matter how many times you do not think alike, a sister is   a gift from God. All you who are blessed with a sister – treasure her. Always.  My sister and I never argued, never had a fight.  For all the years of our lives, we never argued. We simply couldn't see any benefit in arguing a point. What for?

 She was my sister. She is my big sister. And so she will remain. Here in my heart. I won't have a sister to turn to other than in my heart and head.  And I know she is sitting up there now. In the best seats in the stadium with our parents. With her beloved grandparents, especially Zaidy smiling down and laughing. And sending me a message. “Not to worry. I'm always here with you. Do you always feel me? Deep within your soul. And naturally. I'll send you messages on how to correct yourself when you go wrong. For Sure For always   I am your big sister and for always, you are my little sister.”

   Rest in peace. Tzipi. You fought hard for so long. Take a break. Relax.  We got you. For always.